I have an epic post I started yesterday. It’s saved and may pop up at a later date.

I am still processing the happenings from yesterday. Last night was the Morrissey show here in Las Vegas. It didn’t go how I envisioned (but what does really in life). I learned some life lessons and Morrissey took my note. Later in the week when I have really worked it all out, I will post about it so I can remember every little  bit of this.

Anyway, my body feels beat up (as it should) and I am still trying to get over this cold. I have 19 days until Christmas and still tons of knitting to do. I am almost done with the body of the Steggie hoodie from Knitty so the goal is to maybe push through that this weekend. It does include intarsia sleeves so fingers crossed that I can more than muddle through that or I may just be gifting a black hoodie.

Later today I have a drs appointment and there was discussion of popping in to a yarn store, hopefully before the appointment.    

Current Listening: David Cross-I Drink for a Reason

I remembered that I didn’t blog yet today and failed at getting the first post going of my 1001 project. Oh well. This afternoon was a lesson in patience when you are sick and fading away and you cannot get anything accomplished. My computer barely worked at the new office for like two hours.

I did manage to not get super angry today at work when certain people and situations frustrated me. Big moment for me. I am pretty pleased with myself. My mom would say that I should never let it get that bad so really I am back at square one. I desperately wish I could be like my sister (who is also my co worker) and let everything roll off and not really care. She has a plan to get out and I eventually need one too. Moving on.

Tomorrow is Morrissey day. I am getting there pretty early with knitting and Bitch Magazine in bag. Dani is going to come have lunch with me and keep me company. Hopefully I will get to meet and chit chat with some fellow fans. I think it will be good for me to get out of my comfort zone and I feel this is the ultimate fan experience that I haven’t experienced. Need to figure out which project is coming with me. Probably a pair of socks.

Current Listening: the sound of being rejected on google wave (see I am insanely cranky and moody-time for meds and bed)

Current Knitting: Steggie (so close to finishing the body I can feel it but intarsia is not going to be line knitting)

I realized over the past couple of days that for that short period that I blogged everyday even if I had nothing to say, I was happy. So I am going to really really blog everyday now. Seriously. For reals.

Also I just came from Julie and Julia. It was really good. It inspired me to really commit to the 1001 records to hear before you die project. I know it will be insanely good for me and it will be good to commit to something. I feel it will keep me sane while trying to deal with my job, the closing of the house (which is getting closer and closer) and being me. I start tomorrow, working backwards decade wise and the book was published in I think the mid 00s. I have notes in my Batgirl notebook for a few records but I think I am going to relisten and make additional notes. It will be all personal journey and by personal journey I mean totally self centered and such to the point of annoying. Makes you want to read it right? Totally makes me want to quit already. But what I kinda want to do is listen to all of these by the time I turn 30, which is less than a year away. I don’t know. Got to ponder some more tonight while watching Glee.

I have been sick with a yucky cold since Sunday and have been super stressed  because Morrissey is in less than two days. I have committed to getting in line at an insane hour to get on the rail and hand him my note and maybe touch his hand. I figure this is my last chance (lucky #8?), gotta do it right? Right.

Christmas presents are sort of moving along. I still have many more to do but I do have some done. I haven’t really compared to a list of what is done and what still needs to be done. Trying not to stress.

Okay I am going to continue harass Dani and watch Glee. Until tomorrow.

Current Listening: Jemina Pearl-Break it Up

Current Knitting: Steggie

It’s been over a week since I have last posted. Since then, I think I have been in a downward spiral. All the stress and worry and anxiety of life has caught up to me in a major way again. I’m managing the best I can. I spent the week not going anywhere (saving money in gas and entertainment though) watching House and knitting. I did finish a couple of Christmas presents in the last week and started a couple more. That’s pretty much all I am pleased with currently. Oh and I went to the grocery store yesterday morning.

I know part of this downturn is PMS which is pretty bad but I am anxious about a family (minus my mom) trip that we are taking this coming up weekend. I don’t know why I cannot handle overnight trips. I get extremely anxious and can’t handle things. All I can focus on is when I can get home. We will see. Hopefully I can conquer this but I don’t know. It will be with my family who I absolutely adore and have so much fun with. They help me even out and hopefully I can get turned back around on life again this week. Plus I will have an obscene amount of knitting with me to do, when I can’t go on the super crazy rollercoasters. Another thing is I finally received a response back about an issue that has been weighing on me all year. I have to deal with that this week too. It is not good for me to hide in my messy apartment and watch tv on dvd. I need to meet things head on and move forward.

Today will be busy at work since it is month end time and I have a slew of podcasts to listen to. On days like this, I feel less alone when I listen to podcasts because it’s like someone is talking to me constantly and keeping my thoughts away from anxiety. Also today is the start of the local NPR fundraising drive so I get no local for a couple of weeks. I’m glad I still have the Sirius radio.

I am going to set very simple and easy goals and hopefully when I go to bed tonight I can feel good about something.

-Listen to all the podcasts

-Stay focused on tasks today at work and get as much done as possible

-Go to see my parents and watch Top Chef and hang out and chat. Maybe talk about the house plans

-Take out some of the trash that is built up from packing and stuff.

I think those can be accomplished. I thought I was over these meltdowns but apparently not. I feel disappointed in myself. Hopefully next Monday will be a ton better.

I didn’t blog or take a picture for yesterday. There are a couple stresses that are becoming a little to overwhelming. Yesterday, I just came home, watched House and knitted on a Christmas present and went to bed really early. I feel a bit better today but I remembered that today is actually Friday not Saturday and I must go to work.

The Traveling Woman shawl I am working on as a Christmas present out of the Malabrigo is coming along nicely. I just have the second chart to do and bind off. Here’s hoping to finishing that this weekend and getting another gift started. I know for sure I absolutely cannot afford not to finish all the handmade gifts. There isn’t enough money for be to not finish and buy store bought gifts. I hope my family understands. I’m sure they will, they are very supportive of my knitting.

The money situation is really stressing me out. I have done quite a bit cutting back but still more needs to happen before January. I worry that maybe buying a house wasn’t the best idea. The idea just started one day by my sister coming in my office and telling me it would be a good idea. We chatted about it for a few minutes and I talked to my mom and before I knew it I was looking at houses. Ultimately, I know this stress will pass but now, it feels a bit suffocating. All I want to do is make sure I finish my Christmas gifts and not go anywhere. Going anywhere most of the time includes spending money and it is stressful. Even getting a tank of gas is becoming hard. After I move in January, I am going to look into getting a part time job at somewhere fun. Hopefully the record store will be hiring and will like me enough.

Have to head to work to stress some more.

Current Listening: Jemina Pearl “Break It Up”

Today was a fairly good day. Nothing major happened but lots of nice little happenings. Lunch was good. NPR started streaming the new R.E.M. live record (which is phenomenal), made progress on projects at work and desk becoming less of a disaster, and had an awesome dinner with old co workers/friends and my sister.

The interworkings of an office is quite interesting. I remember learning about things like this in 100 level Communication classes but everyone thinks their office is the most dysfunctional. Mine is no different and no one can quite understand like people who were/are in the same office. It is always good to catch up about life and get down to the gossip and ways to make office life more interesting.

I was out far too late to catch Glee and up way past my bedtime.

Time I left, up too late

Current Listening: nothing/silence

I’m lucky. I have a pretty sister to model my shawls, who happens to work at the same office as me. We had a spur of the moment photo shoot with the shawls I blocked last night. Here’s Di modeling the Zoe by Emily Kausalik.

Hopefully a review of the pattern and the Noro Silk Garden Sock will be up on Socks Debunked tomorrow. I am also planning on posting reviews of a couple more small shawl patterns and a couple sock yarns.

Christmas knitting is back into full swing again and I am less stressed about it at the moment. I found a few patterns that I am excited to work and in yarn that will be nice to work with. What I am dreading at the moment is the 4 or 5 hats that will need to be made. I’m sure I will be ready for those if I work through the other small shawls, chunky blanket and kids dino hoodie in quick time.

Tonight was nice. After work, I went to the yarn store and worked on my Christmas present at the moment and hung out with Dani. She gave me a silkscreened poster of lyrics from my favorite song of all time, “There is a Light that Never Goes Out” for my birthday. I love it and can’t wait to hang it in my music room in my new house.

I am refraining from posting about anything too deep this week because I am insanely stressed about work over the insane meeting last week. I figure if I try to keep everything light around me then things will lighten up and I will too. Time to catch up on tv missed and go to bed.

Current Listening:Those Darlins S/T

Work was a test in patience and just plain rough today. I had to take a couple of anxiety pills to calm down after being overwhelmed over really nothing. This was one of the telltale signs of a bad day (while counting money)

There is no use in detailing out the annoyances or my hate for my job. I feel it would just turn this blog into a bitching blog and no one likes a warm pickle. So after the insanely long day and waiting an hour at the pharmacy for my very expensive pills, it was nice to get home and block my shawls. I also watched the first disc of House (the only person crankier than me today) season 5 while working on my Traveling Woman shawl. The shawl is moving along fairly quickly and the Malabrigo is to die for. If I could knit out of Malabrigo for the rest of my life, I am pretty sure I would, in a heartbeat.

I’m hoping the shawls will be dry enough tomorrow to model and take pictures of to update my Ravelry projects and finally finally update on Socks Debunked
It has been way too long.

Current Listening: Jemina Pearl “Break it Up”

Today was full of calm, which was nice after achieving an awesome tension headache because of the tension in my family. I laid in bed and watched season 1 and small part of season 2 of The Office and finished my Limerick shawl. Immediately, I began the Traveling Woman shawl in Malabrigo sock yarn. It’s beautiful. I was hoping to block the two shawls I have finished and wash my handknit socks tonight but I am too beat. Tomorrow after work for sure.

Today is my brother’s 21st birthday. It’s weird. I remember the day he was born very clearly. I was 8 and in 2nd grade. We got a project to make puppets out of boxes and I ran home. My dad was there I got an empty box of dog treats and was telling my dad about the project and he told me that mom had the baby. I was like awesome and then ran back to the neighbor’s house to work on my project.

My brother has turned into an awesome guy though. He is very different from me and my two sisters, being the youngest of 4. We were excited about him when he was a baby. He took a bit longer to start talking because my mom said we all spoke for him and it could probably be said it remained true. He is of few words but when he does want to speak, he is very intelligent, funny, caring and amazing. After all, he is 21 today, legal drinking and gambling age but he was home studying for his midterm tomorrow and had to run out to his flag football game. I am really fortunate to have him in my life and I love the crap out of him.

Before going to see the family, I stopped by my house and took some more pictures.

Me in the front door way  

Front exterior where garage is

The back of the house where the main door is

Now on to you tube to look  for videos for Video Monday on Indie As

Current Listening: Karen O and the Kids “Where the Wild Things Are” OST

Just got home from seeing Where the Wild Things Are, which I loved and cried at. I have a massive tension headache so I am going to post the pic of me messaging where the pain is and write more tomorrow.